November 19, 2008

Control Issues

So...maybe I am a little type A. Maybe I do use my iPhone to record every time Ella nurses. Maybe I did create a Sleep Graph (as recommended in Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child). Maybe I should just let babies be when hungry, sleep when tired, no schedule, no worries. But I have this nagging worry that 3 months down the road I'll end up with a sleep problem that is huge, a baby that is unhealthy in her eating habits and a life that is chaotic.

Whoa...maybe I should just slow down a little and enjoy today, because Ella is going to grow up before I know it. Elder Ballard once quoted Anna Quindlen, saying
“The biggest mistake I made [as a parent] is the one that most of us make. . . . I did not live in the moment enough. This is particularly clear now that the moment is gone, captured only in photographs. There is one picture of [my three children] sitting in the grass on a quilt in the shadow of the swing set on a summer day, ages six, four, and one. And I wish I could remember what we ate, and what we talked about, and how they sounded, and how they looked when they slept that night. I wish I had not been in such a hurry to get on to the next thing: dinner, bath, book, bed. I wish I had treasured the doing a little more and the getting it done a little less”(Loud and Clear [2004], 10–11)
I am really trying to focus more on enjoying the moments. Those precious smiles when she wakes up from a nap. Bathtime. Walks where she nuzzles her head against my chest. Her curiosity that is already apparent. Picking out clothes to wear for the day. Listening to her jabber. Getting a good burp. Changing a messy diaper (when this only happens once every 4 days you find yourself enjoying it!) The list goes on and on. The trick is to be able to see these things in the moment.

But I think I will still keep using my Nursing Tracker and Sleep Graph.


Danielle said...

It totally cracks me up to see you whip out your IPhone to see when you last fed Ella!

and PS. I'm pretty sure that life tends to be chaotic no matter what you do when you have kids...but that being said, its great to try to create a sense of order for your children.

Thayer said...

I think it's safe to say you're more than a little type A :) But since she's slept 9 hours more than one night already, you must be doing something right!

kimmy girl said...

did motherhood make you crazy? i never remember you being like this before!!! maybe motherhood will do it to me too and make me use an iphone tracker. i shouldnt talk, huh!

Jessica said...

Well we have "excel" sheets for just about everything Harm has ever done so no worries. I think it's called being a parent and I think we're genetically hard wired to be this way. Think of how proud you'll be when she doesn't NEED the charts and graphs anymore, it's a big day!

Jessica said...

I love that quote. It's something I totally need to work on. Thanks for including it! I may steal it for my blog, too.

amber said...

I like to call this "1st child syndrome", we all go through it and by number 3, you are using your iphone to play music to tune out the kids...... :). (She is adorable by the way... can't wait to meet her!)