eighteen at eighteen

1. She will accept food within 2 degrees of room temperature. Outside of that "itshot" or "whooooo" (it's cold).
2. Colors dominate her vocabulary right now. I hear "booh," "behn," "bahh," "rhed" (blue, pink, black and red) about five hundred times a day. Turns out this world is a pretty colorful place when you're looking for it.
3. She is a good little sleeper...most of the time.
4. We still struggle without Miralax or a healthy portion of prunes. Breaks my heart to see her in pain.
5. 95th percentile in length, 25th in weight. How did we get such a tall kid?
6. She is not good at sharing and throws a fit if someone takes something that Ella perceives is not theirs. Example: at Kimmy's wedding Ella was the ring bearer. Her only job was to hand Kimmy the pillow at the appropriate time. But Ella was sure the pillow was Grandma's, and there was no way she was going to let Kimmy have it. We did convince her the pillow was Kimmys's, which led her to want to give it to Kimmy RIGHT NOW. At home, if Mom sits in Dad's chair, or if Dad uses Mom's laptop...oh how we hear about it.
7. She is very organized. I think she got it from her Grandma Janet.
8. She loves to talk on the phone. Pretend, real, doesn't much matter.
9. She loves coloring. Especially when you are the one doing it. She loves for you to draw families of birds and then name them. Mommy bird, Daddy bird, Ella bird, Grandma Bird, Grandpa Bird, Kimmy Bird and Avery Bird. She remembers who's who, too. It amazes me.
10. Things in her crib right now: monkey 1, monkey 2, mouse, moose, bunny, giraffe, bear, elephant, kangaroo, dog, two books and an extra sleep sack.
11. She loves having her ears checked. She asks me to do it whenever she sees the otoscope.
12. We got into a bad habit of drinking milk before falling asleep. As it is with bad habits, I thought it was something we only did every now and then, in special circumstances. Too late I realized she had become dependent on it and now we are in the painful process of breaking it.
13. She gives a little chuckle once you understand what she's trying to say.
14. After months of trying to teach her to say 'please' and 'thank-you' I finally turned to signs. Works like a charm. Of course no one knows she is being polite. They just think she is hitting her face. But it's a start.
15. She can nearly finish a carton of grape tomatoes before we leave the grocery store.
16. Most words are noises that you have to decipher, but a few are very clear: mouse, moose, wash, walk. It's really cute.
17. She's fascinated by her shadow. She knows it is somehow her, and will say "me" and wave, but doesn't quite get it.
18. Monkeys and dogs tie for favorite animal.

twelve years too late

When Ella was 12 months old I took her in for her year 1 year visit. I love going to my Pediatrician. He is wise and kind and funny and sarcastic. He was one of my mentors while in residency and he still has a larger than life aura in my eyes. But for this particular visit I was a little nervous. Because I knew which shots were given at 12 months. MMR, Varicella and Hepatitis A. And while I wasn't really worried about introducing these into my child's system, there was a little tiny part of me that thought, "What if Jenny McCarthy is right?" It didn't help that there was a magazine in the waiting room graced with her beautiful smile and her autistic child.

I did, however, give Ella all of her vaccines. And Charlie reassured me, as he always does, in his warm, only slightly sarcastic, manner.

It got me thinking, though. I tell my vaccines ≠ autism speech one to ten times a week. And I believe it. But I still worried. In the end I felt very good about my decision, and a little silly for my hesitation. But it's different when it's your own kid. You want to do what's 110% right. Never any harm.

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So if you've ever hesitated, or worried, or not vaccinated your child....I get it. Autism can be scary. And Jenny can be pretty convincing. But I think that in this instance we are all victims of the incredible media hype surrounding this issue. Fear drives decisions, not facts. And when you know the whole story fear is replaced by understanding. So I thought I'd do my own little PSA and share what I know.

The autism story...

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12 years ago there was a gastroenterologist in England. Dr. Wakefield. He looked at 12 children (eight of whom had autism) concluded that the combined MMR vaccine could contribue to the bowel problems, which might be connected to autism. This study got published in a reputable journal, the Lancet. And, bam. The media grabbed hold of the story and it spread like wildfire. The cause of autism. Vaccines. This was huge. (Although it was a little bit of a leap, even for the Wakefield faithful. The article did state, "We did not prove an association between measles, mumps, and rubella vaccine and the syndrome [autism] described".)

Parents everywhere started to worry. Vaccination rates dropped, as low as 50% in some parts of London. Measles rates rose. Children died.

But after the initial hype, doctors started taking a closer look at the Wakefield study. Turns out it was a little messy. There were no controls (normal children to compare t0). Many of the children in the study were involved with anti-vaccine lawyers before the study began, not randomly selected. The methodology was shoddy. And Dr. Wakefield was in the process of creating his own "safer" non-combined MMR vaccine. He stood to significantly benefit from a decline in the use of the combined MMR vaccine.

As it goes in medicine, if there is one ground breaking study, follow-up studies soon follow to see if the results can be replicated. And the studies came in. Dozens of them. Two studies, one by Dr. Wakefield and both with significant flaws, showed a relationship between bowel disorders and the MMR vaccine. But none were able to show a link between autism and vaccinations. None.

One of the first studies came out of England. It investigated the relationship between the MMR vaccine and autism. They looked at 498 children and found no difference in the rates of autism between the vaccinated and unvaccinated children.

A study in California looked at the relationship between the increasing number of autism cases and receipt of the MMR vaccine. Between 1980 and 1994 there was a dramatic rise in autism, but the percentage of children receiving the MMR vaccine remained the same. A similar study was conducted in England with the same results.

One of the best studies was done in Denmark between 1991 and 1998. They looked at 537,303 children (compared to Wakefield's 12). They looked at the risk of autism in the vaccinated children (about 80% of them) compared to the unvaccinated children. No difference. There was also no association found between the age at the time of vaccination and the development of autism.

Last month the Lancet officially retracted the original Wakefield paper. (Most of the authors of the paper had already taken their names off the paper.) They effectively said, "This paper should have never been published." But it was published, and oh, the damage it has done.

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An average of 1 in 110 children are autistic. The most striking signs of autism appear around 12 to 15 months, the same time the MMR vaccine is given. Statistically, if you have 40 million children, approximately 400,000 of those children will have autism. Out of those 400,000 some of those children are going to start developing symptoms around the time they get their vaccines. They just are. Not because of the vaccines, but just because of coincidence. But try and tell the mother of the one who stopped talking the day after she received her MMR that the two are not related. It's a hard sell.

My own opinion is that there is a genetic component as well as an environmental risk factor. The issue is finding out just what that risk factor is. The only thing that I can conclusively say is that vaccines do NOT cause autism. I know this because they have been studied again, and again, and again. But what about other risk factors. Is it microwaves? Hormones in cows milk? Cell phones during pregnancy? I don't know. And unfortunately, the controversy surrounding vaccines diverts attention and resources from finding out what is really causing autism.

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So there you have it. My autism talk. Now, one small caveat. Although they do not cause autism, I don't think vaccines are 100% safe for every single child. There are some children with underlying disorders who will react poorly to vaccines. My cousin's son, a patient of mine, has a seizure disorder. He had a major seizure after receiving his 6 month vaccines. We are holding off on the rest of immunizations until we can get his seizures under control. But for the vast majority of children, the risk associated with vaccines is much lower than the risk associated with the diseases they prevent. And as more and more children are unvaccinated, the risk of vaccine-preventable diseases increases because the "herd immunity" is less protective.

When it comes down to it, my family is the most important and best thing in my life. I try to not recommend anything to patients or friends that I wouldn't feel comfortable giving Ella. I have given her all of the available vaccines, and felt good about the decision. And it hasn't done her any harm. She's a genius. Just ask her grandma.

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Other resources:

I think this is a great article. Her book, Baby 411, is one of my favorites.
Another good one here.

If you want to dig REALLY deep...read the Institute of Medicine Report. All 154 pages.

a day in the life

A few weeks ago I decided that I wanted to try and capture Ella at 17 months. Someday I will want to remember that she says "know-s" for snow, that she sleeps with a sleep sack and an elephant, that she likes the letters "e" and "o", and that she likes to 'put away' the groceries. She changes so quickly; this already feels outdated. So here it is. An iPhone's view.

Fair warning: If Ella is not your child, or your child's child, or your child's child's child, don't bother with the next 6 minutes and 46 seconds. It's a little boring. But if she is your child, or your child's child, or your child's child's child, you'll love it.

new uses

for an old box

{that brought us a new carseat! ella's loving it}

encourage me

I love watching the Amazing Race. Mostly because I like seeing where they travel, and then dreaming of visiting all those far off places. But also because you get characters. Like the happy hippies. Or the Mormon-hating "Christian" family. Or the couple from the sticks. Or the mother and her deaf son. The list goes on and on. This year there was one couple that pretty much had it all together, and they ended up winning. They were fairly upbeat; perhaps to a fault. During one daunting task, the girl looked at her partner and said, "Encourage me, Cheyne. Encourage me." The way she said it was pretty funny, and it came off a little pathetic. Ryan mocked her. But I kind of got it. Sometimes you know you need a little encouragement, and sometimes you've got to ask for it.

I need some encouragement.

Since I was 10 I have had bad posture. Slumped over, stooped over, bad posture. My parents tried to help me {I couldn't get my ears pierced until I improved}, I would try to focus on it, and while our efforts helped for a while I would always fall off the wagon.

When we were in Italy this fall I once again noticed how poor my posture was (funny how pictures standing next to your pitch perfect sister will do that). I'm heading toward hunchback. So I jumped back on the wagon. I went to a physical therapist, got some exercises, and have been making a sincere effort.

But now it's been 3 weeks, and the 40 minutes a day spent doing these stupid exercises is getting a little old. I am seeing a difference {one of my ribs actually poked out funny, and now it is going back in place} but I can tell that I am on the verge of letting it slide. And then I may end up a hunchback forever.

So....encourage me. Tell me how you've persevered and how worth it is. Or tell me that no one likes a hunchback. That if I don't take care of this now, you won't be my friend. {I really like having friends--that one might work}

Thanks. It worked for Megan and Cheyne.

yum, yum, yum

The Harlem Family Recipe Book strikes again. This time it's dessert. And it's delicious. Right, Annie?

Carrot Cake Supreme

(Karen Bryner)

2 cups flour

2 tsp baking soda

1/2 tsp salt

2 tsp cinnamon

3 large eggs

2 cups sugar

3/4 cup vegetable oil

3/4 cup buttermilk

2 tsp vanilla

2 c grated carrots

1 (8 ounce) can crushed pineapple, well drained

3.5 ounces flaked coconut

1 c chopped pecans (I left this out)

Preheat oven to 350. Grease and flour three 9-inch round cake pans. Stir together dry ingredients. Beat eggs and mix wet ingredients with electric mixer. Add flour mixture, beating at low speed until blended. Fold in carrots, pineapple, coconut and pecans. Pour into prepared pans. Bake for 25-30 minutes.

Frost with Deluxe Cream Cheese Frosting. Chill for several hours before slicing. Store in fridge. For best results, cover and chill cake, serve on second day.

Deluxe Cream Cheese Frosting

11 ounces cream cheese, softened

3/4 cup butter, softened

16 ounces powdered sugar (I didn't use quite this much)

1 1/2 tsp vanilla

Beat cream cheese and butter at medium speed until smooth. Gradually add powdered sugar, beating at low speed until light and fluffy, 1-3 minutes. Stir in vanilla.

16 at 16

1. She's really into symmetry. If she brings you one shoe from the closet, you can bet your bottom dollar that the match is on it's way. And you'd better put them on. Same goes for kisses and tricks. If mom gets a kiss, so does dad and anyone else that's in the room. If you ask her where her nose is not only will she show you, but she will also touch yours, dad's, grandma's and the stranger's sitting across the room.
2. She's got the most expressive face. The other day I put her in a sweater that was too small. She lifted both her arms up, twisted side to side and gave me a look that said, "Mom. Seriously? What are you thinking?"


3. Her eyes are still in flux. Some days they are hazel, other times brown, and on a rare day, blue.
4. Almost all of her 'words' are monosyllabic and are missing the last few letters. Although she does turn more into a two syllable word. Mow-uh, with the uh really high-pitched.
5. She really loves her bottle. Given the choice of a sippy cup of milk and a bottle of water she will pick the bottle.
6. Listening to her sing is one of my favorite things on this earth.
7. She has four teeth coming in, and then we are DONE! Well, at least for a year or so.
8. If she makes a "mess," a relatively common occurrence, she wants it cleaned up right away. However, I think we may need to narrow the definition of the word. The other day she was in the bath and splashed water on her arm. "Mess! Mess! Mess!"

9. Finally figured out animal sounds.
10. Hearing evidence of aviation stops her in her tracks. Eyes and pointer finger reach for the sky until she finds the source. Her father's daughter indeed.
11. We are on the Nursery countdown. Our ward has the best nursery leader. February, here we come. Sacrament meeting, on the other hand....still struggling.
12. We wish our cousins and grandmas and aunts lived closer. And our friends Lily and Bea, too.
13. We are grateful for our friends who live close. Keeps us sane. That and the Discovery Gateway Museum. Love that place.
14. She likes it when you whisper in her ear.
15. She says Mom 500 times a day. Maybe more. "Uh" used to be the catch-all word. It is now "ma."
16. A very boring video. But if you're a grandma, you can see her fold her arms, say "more" (twice), "mmm", "no" "mama" and stuff her face full of food, only to spit it all out. One of our favorite tricks.

first haircut

bedtime bliss and blues

For two or three weeks, we really had it good. Around nap time/bed time, I'd ask Ella if she wanted to go to bed. She'd nod her head yes, we'd read a few stories, say prayers and then she would point to her crib. She would cuddle up with her monkey, elephant, dog, bunny, Duke Bear, and bottle (she just held it, it was empty) and would smile as I left. It was heavenly.

Now we are back to the scream and cry for 30 seconds to a minute and then go to sleep. Not as much fun.

I don't know what I'm doing wrong. I didn't know what I was doing right.

The ebb and flow of childhood.

I think I liked the ebb.

couldn't be happier

My baby sister's getting hitched. One month from today she will become Mrs. Chris Crosby. Nice work, Kimmy. You got a good one.

Check them out. So hip. So beautiful. So clean. Love it.

calling all crafters

I have this fabulous idea spinning around in my head...only problem...execution. So any creative ideas you have, please send them my way.

We recently completely renovated our office, and now I have 3 gorgeous exam rooms to decorate. I really want to have something in the rooms that will occupy the children while they wait, have minimal germs, and appeal to all ages. I saw these memory cards

at Antrho a few weeks ago, and it got me thinking...wouldn't it be fun to have a memory game hanging on the wall in each room. Minimal fomites (although I would still have a can of Clorox wipes on a shelf above each game for the germaphobe mamas), appeals to all ages, and tons of cool images out there.

But how to create it. That's what stumps me. I've had a few thoughts, but nothing that seems practical. I have a reasonable budget to get these rooms looking good; it seems like this could work.

So any ideas you may have, please share. Bored kids and parents throughout the Wasatch front are counting on it.

Thanks.

one day only

Deals to be had. I bet they will go quickly. {most of the xs and s are already gone} May be worth getting up at 12 am pst...

**Post edit: it's not as great as we thought it would be. sorry to anyone who got up in the wee hours.

2010

A new year. A new decade. I think she's up for it.

my little hobo

We had a great Christmas. Maybe the best yet. Could have something to do with this little one...

There is something about the Santa suit, the messy hair, and the black eye that reminds me of a hobo child. Although the hobo would wear the Santa suit in May, so I suppose we've got that going for us. Even looking a little disheveled, bordering on homeless, we love her more than we ever knew possible.

Thanks, Ella, for making this a Christmas to remember.

just for the record...

{so maybe it's now 2 to 1. watch out next time.}